being blunt

Last time it was about people affecting me, this time it's about me affecting people.

There are moments where I would be socially inadequate and say the wrong things that make some people mad, there are also times where I am aware that what I'm saying might causes interpersonal issues, and decided to say it out loud anyways.

There are issues with both, however. It's obvious when I'm unaware of the situation, but when I'm not, the problem lies on the fact that I don't actually know why people get triggered over some sentences that I said, it's like not knowing how the key works while using a key to the lock.

Before we begin, me being blunt is basically me saying things like "what you just draw is pretty bad because... and you can improve it by..." or simply "nah it's pretty bad" if I happened to not have much of a connection with the person, or if I am simply trying to express my opinion on something that's not directly about the person who bring the thing up.

Like I understand that not everyone would be capable of taking many forms of criticisms, but many times I've seen people getting upset over me just because I'm criticising their work, in which it's very well just my opinion and I don't mind if they don't care about it as long as they have a belief to not do so.

When you are posting your work on the Internet, if you get enough publicity, you would be getting comments, and comments can be positive or negative. People like positive comments, makes sense, but when they received negative comments they would suddenly treat you like you're the enemy of their world.

The biggest problem is that the type of people that I'm describing would (usually) not be willing to describe what they actually want from their creation, as long as they see it perfect. But the funny thing is that, they'd also show their creation to others, as if there is not going to be people who dislikes their work for their own valid reasoning that does not have to be adapted.

I asked a few people and turns out it's for them to seek validation, and it's fair enough until you realised it's basically just circlejerking. It isn't really a problem because not everything has to be on public, it is really cool that you want to share stuff that you like to people who you found safe. However, people circlejerk at public, which all of a sudden makes them very vulnerable to criticisms, because now outsiders can see through your supposedly private stuff and there's nothing you can do about it.

There are also problems with normal circlejerking however, which is that sometimes there would be moments where the person bans some people within a private group, which makes it worse than circlejerking publicly in a way, because now you're just indirectly telling the other guy that you hate them, and simply trying to avoid the person while doing so won't help either, as both co-exists within a group, and it's only going to be a matter of time when things blow up, which (normally) nobody would want that.

The other problem is that people would also dislike me for me hating on things like fictional characters, or some ideas that they might want to adapt. There are times where I don't know how somethings means a lot to the person, and just split my words out without actually being aware of it, but there are also times where it's simply what they want/like, and they'd still make me criticising them a big deal to them.

While I wish to gain the ability to give more of a damn about things in life, I also wish some people to try to not give as much of a damn as they should, for the sake of each other's sanity. Though it's also possible that I'm simply not compatible with such people, despite me having no means in hating on them, because most of them who are like that are actually pretty cool, since all they really need is validation, but I guess that also makes them less able to handle critics, and maybe I'm the real jerk all along.


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